Monday, January 07, 2008

YOU GOT MAIL

I’m pretty sure my mom is about to bail on me.

So I call her last week and she says, “You’ll never guess what just happened...”

Miss Jean from across the street calls her and tells her that some she saw some kid take the envelops out of my mother’s mailbox and run through her back yard. She said she saw it through her window. The kid came to the door like he was offering to shovel her driveway (Damn, I miss old school kids who used to HUSTLE out in the cold. Not these new Xbox young fucks!)…but um, my nephew’s old school. He took care of that snow as soon as it stopped falling.

Now, we’ve lived in this same house for 30+ years, and my mom is in fact, old school. Ever since she retired and is home during delivery times, she could tell you the names of damn near every mailman in order of employment. She still believes in greeting and asking about the kids and leaving him gifts at holiday times and offering him tea when it’s cold out. She’s accustomed to leaving her mail out for him, secured with a clothespin, even when she doesn’t have stamps. He always got her. Her mail doesn’t even need an address. It’ll get to her, as long as it has her name on it.

So my mom goes outside and checks the mailbox and sure enough, it’s empty. On that morning she had run to the bank and thought he had already come through while she was gone. She walks down the paved driveway and peeps the footprints dotting the snow through the back yard.

Miss Jean had immediately called my nephew to go find the boy, but he was at work. (Neighbors having each other’s phone numbers…how old school is THAT!) Luckily, her grandkids saw the boy. Knew where he stayed.

“What kind of mail did he steal, Mommy?”

“My credit card and car insurance payments.”

Wow mom.

By the time she had called the jakes (sn!tching runs in the family??), Miss Jean’s grandson was knocking on my mom’s door. He’s an Xbox kid for sure. About 15 or so. Him and his younger brother are like my mom’s little mentees. Their daddy’s in the bing, and their grandma can’t control them. But they STAY stopping by Mama Wise’s crib before school every morning, and whent hebus drops them off after school, and even spend the night when my mom’s in the mood for noise in the house.

Young Xbox hands my mother her mail. He went running around the block, like a tough old school maverick, and got my mom’s shit back.

“I swear, I’m so ready to be out!” I’ve never heard this conviction from my mother before. Tomorrow she’ll board a plane home to Jamaica and she’ll be gone almost a month. My siblings and nephew will man the crib. The neighborhood will provide an extra set of eyes.

She’s finally gonna start work on the house down there that she and my father had been plotting for the last 30+ years. They’re old school immigrants. Come here, hustle, raise and educate your kids, go back home, ball out. I always knew she’d do it. But I never quite believed she’d really dip. But there’s really nothing stopping her. Her children are grown. She's a widow. Her grandkids the only real attachment now. She’s outgrown her community. She uses the word ‘ghetto’ now, often.

I laugh, cuz it’s funny, cuz that’s a word she’s learned, or conceptualized from incidents like the Mail Fraud. The kid who stole her shit was 12.

When her house is done, she will move. And I’ll be lost. But she’s earned it. She’s weathered 30+ unforgiving winters. Made her connections. Raised and educated me. She’s left her mark. She should go and I should be happy.

And that suddenly opens up the possibilities of a whole world with my name on it.

18 comments:

Blah Blah Blah said...

Good for mommy.

Wise in Jamaica. Oh lord, what will those stories be like. Methinks total inhibition?

So Ma Wise selling the old spot or so the kids get it?

Amadeo said...

That's crazy...I debate if would want to move away and have to take planes to come back and see my mother. Couldn't imagine if SHE dipped.

Adei von K said...

yeah, my Pops goes home (Ghana) every year to make sure his retirement crib is still cool. and my sis is a senior in highschool so you know they're about to be OUT!

Awwww, what are you going to do without mama wise?

Southerner in Suomi said...

Wise my mom and aunt are the biggest roamers in the world now that they're retired.

They take trips to Vegas and Jamaica and have just finished the next two: Italy and Nigeria. Yep these heffas are renting a villa for two weeks.

I smell house party in BR. Lol.

So...Wise...Sista said...

Blah...The funny thing is Igo to JA with my fam, so inhibitions notsomuch. Maybe someone will take me there one day so I can wild out. :) The fate of the house is in my hands. I couldnt BEAR to sell it, EVER.


Amadeo...Isnt that nuts? Like the ground being pulled out from under you. But mamas gotta eat too, I guess. :)


Stace...Oh they must be counting down the days til her graduation! lol I honestly dont know what Ima do. I damn near be going thru it when she goes a few weeks.

VDiz...Yo, your mom/aunt be doing it! That's kind of the life I'm plotting for myself currently...a full 30some odd years prior to retirement. lol

Anonymous said...

My mom threw out the "its all good" phrase the other day, and I couldn't stop giggling.

But anyways, wow, how exciting for your Mom. Sounds like she's definitely ret-ta-go. Wish you guys the best!

Jameil said...

awww!! if my mom was from another country and tried to leave me i would SOOOOOO throw a hissy fit. *remember i'm the fave! and yes snitchin is genetic!

aquababie said...

i applaud your mom for doing what she's doing. but i can sympathize with how you feel. my mom has not reitred yet. i would love for her to travel. i would hate for her to move away.

La said...

Awww :-( You're really not focusing on the right parts... the REAL question is how do we get MY mother to go WITH her? (or just away) lol I'm sure you can find some sucker to take you to Jamaica so you can act an ass...

So...Wise...Sista said...

BGood...Uncontemporary Mom + Contemporary Colloquialism = Comedic Magic! lol

Jam...I'm not even the fav, I'm like just about dead last most times...so I dont think Im allowed to Hissy.

Aqua...Is there an equivalent of the Empty Nest syndrome when it's the parents who fly off? lol

Ladidahdi...Um...I'll send your mom pictures of the view of the beach??

About that Sucker...

the joy said...

thats so weird. i would never move back to ct. but i giess thats not the same. i mean, if mom moves back, youll always have some where to stay. tell her to get a property by the water, and im there.

So...Wise...Sista said...

Joy...You're in! :)

Mr.Slish said...

I wanna know why the boy took the mail...No one beat im backside!!!

Anonymous said...

If I could afford it my arse would be moving to the Caribbean. I would go to Trinidad, where the waters are blue and the women are gorgeous....

Miz JJ said...

As someone with West Indian parents who have both moved back to Trinidad I can say it is for the best. They both love it. The weather is better for them and they are surrounded by people who care. Just my 2 cents. Plus it is nice to have a place to visit that is not your auntie's place, but truly your own home.

nikki said...

dang...xbox kid went and got the mail back? that's GREAT! that kid was looking out...

yeah, your mom is old school but in the best way. if her neighborhood is starting to give her grief, then it's time to bounce. the weather is better for her (as already stated). she won't have to deal with the harsh winter and the folk around her trying to take her shit.

So...Wise...Sista said...

Slishy...I've been informed that while Xbox retrieved the mail, his younger, more reckless brother whupped the boy's ass. Mi! I woulda go round deh ahn clap him boxide myself!! Mek him tahn. lol


Epsi...of COURSE you would. lol


Miz JJ says..."Plus it is nice to have a place to visit that is not your auntie's place, but truly your own home."

Oh gosh, that WILL be nice!!!


Nikki...Yup, Xbox did work. My mom loves those kids, and she was saying how if she had looked down on them or been the mean old lady neighbor (like the people next door lol), they wouldnt have thought twice to even tell her her shit was gone. I know it's the best for her...just sucks for lil ole me. :(

dc_speaks said...

wow. im kinda like..whoa...wtf!

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