Tuesday, November 13, 2007

DREAMGIRL


I’m a dreamer, I admit. It was a way of life as a child to sit and dream my way out of my circumstances. Imagine independence and all its spoils. Dream myself a suitable identity and moral character.

Today, all these years later, I can recall so many of those dreams in colors as vivid as a day ago. Maybe because so many of them have been realized. Or perhaps it’s because so many still linger.

Even if you don’t subscribe to the notion, we all harbor desires for one dream or another. The dream job…dream car…dream crib…dream guy or girl…dream vacation…those dreamy shoes.

But do we always accept or even appreciate the dream when it arrives?

In the past week I’ve used the word ‘dream’ to describe two separate circumstances. One of them a writing assignment. I wouldn’t exactly call it the Dream Gig, but I do get to scratch another item off my ‘30 Things I'ma Do Now That I’m 30’ list. But why when confronted with handling up on the assignment, I froze. Couldn’t do it. Looked the gift horse directly in the mouth, down the throat, whole 9 yards. (I have since managed to soldier up, thanks to 90 Millas and My Muse).

The other…*sigh*. I actually called another effing human being a Dream. Come. True. (I know, I know... I’ll pause here for a second so you can join me for a quick vomit). The thing of it is, I meant it, still mean it…but I have no clue what the hell to do about it.

If you’ve ever been called The Dream Girl/Guy, then unceremoniously abandoned like I have, then like me, you're probably a lil dead inside, and you might feel me on the irony and absolute absurdity of it all.

But the fact remains…

A wise (blind with microbraids and a underlip mustache genius musician) man once said…


Theoretically, shouldn’t we be going to the ends of the earth to chase our dreams? Or are dreams fundamentally not meant to come true? Is the subconscious mind a much more liberal and whimsical force than the conscious?

Or is there a dream slayer? Fear.

12 comments:

Pamalicious said...

As one who has been called 'dream come true' in every relationship I've ever been in and then left...alone. I am feeling this post.

It is almost a burden to be someone else's dream, because then you are victim to their inability to recognize and truly know what to do with that dream.

It is better to approach the situation from the angle of power as in "I'm a dream - do you have any?"

That's how ultimately I met, fell in love and got my dream :)

Pamalicious
www.pamalicious.com

Jameil said...

oh my LORD you have been in school too long. all hypothetical and theoretical and parenthetical. (and philosophical but that didn't rhyme.) i have to keep myself on track with my dreams because otherwise I will just sit here and wait for it to find me. and when it does, i try to run away, too. so ridiculous!!

Jameil said...

oh and yes, i did vomit just a tad. :D

Blah Blah Blah said...

...I believe I told you that I don't have any "dreams". Not dead inside...just not there.

Maybe that should be my dream...to have a dream, no?

As for being the "dream girl" in a relationship... yea, that's happened. I tell dudes, "if I am your dream, then you're short changing yourself because I am not putting forth any effort...ever."

*...I DO however realize that I talk alotta shit...this comment included*

Anonymous said...

I feel this blog in so many ways ... one thing that bothers me is that so many folk like to separate dreams and love ... as if the two cant be one in the same ... or if you want love you cant have anything else ...

I understand that they are not always one in the same ...and everyone has a different idea of what a dream is to them...but my dreams have multiple parts ...

I got so tired of hearin "whoever gets you will be one lucky nigga" ... I never understand why people wont allow themselves to be the lucky ones ...

so I think dreams can come true... but if you have to be willing to let them ... and if its you and someone else they have to be willing to let go of the fear that they can be a part of your dream as well..

Adei von K said...

i didn't vomit, i snickered. *lol right now*

dreams, like life, is more about the journey and not the destination. once/if you realize/accomplish this dream, revel in it for a minute and go on to the next dream... unless you're talking abt people. that's a whole 'nother issue.

So...Wise...Sista said...

Pammy...Ahhh, the proverbial power position. I'm trying really hard not to let that be my motive...wow...who AM i?!

Jameil...When I start adding footnotes and primary sources pls pull the plug! haha

Blah...Shit talking aside...you appear to be quite well-adjusted, what with being non existent on the inside. lol

"Maybe that should be my dream...to have a dream, no?"

Why even bother?

Cali says...""whoever gets you will be one lucky nigga" ... I never understand why people wont allow themselves to be the lucky ones ... "

Cuz thats the corniest bullshit line EVER!

Stace says..."more about the journey and not the destination"

Hmmm...

"unless you're talking abt people."

That's what I'm sayin! lol

Anonymous said...

I'm an incredibly, vivid, subconscious dreamer. Not so big on the conscious dreaming, which is probably why I don't chase them.

Is there a such thing as conscious dreaming?

I mean, I'm conscious of my subconscious dreams. But is that the same thing as dreaming consciously?

*shrugs*

Lol, now I'm confusing myself. Lord have mercy.

Anonymous said...

I sort of agree with Stacie...I find dreams to be very "dreamy" while I am still trying to achieve it. Yet, once I have achieved it, it is no longer a dream but reality. Thus taking away all of the excitement of it being a dream in the first place.

My home - was my dream home. I was in heaven watching it being built, etc. But recently, just 5 months later I needed something new to chase after so I got my dream car. Guess what? Now I am trying to figure out, what next. It was soooo much more fun just dreaming about these things because you had something to pursue. Weird???

Don said...

I feel everything you are saying. I been there. So I now subscribe to the action speaks louder than words philosophy.

As you should.

Words are forever. Once the actions stop, then you already know what time it is.

of course that goes both ways.

Stay up

dc_speaks said...

hmmmm. you leave much to ponder with reading the post.

it deserves more than the grass root answer that i could give right now. after giving it some acceptable thought, I will be back to comment.

thanks for posting this.

peace

CNEL said...

I've never been called the dream, but have maybe used the label a time or two.

Fear is so powerful a force, it may make people abandon the dream, turn from the concept of dreaming and willing oneself forward.

What happens when you wake up?
Can the dream be changed or altered?
What effect does interpretation of the dream have?
Cause won't taking time to think about the dream, change the dream?

Disqus for She's Just Not Feeling You...

  • So...Wise??

    My photo
    Our Nation's (HIV) Capital...by way of Harlem, NY and Upsteezy NY
    I'm older than I look, and stupider than you think. But I'm quite proud of my sharp eye for The Ridiculous, and by Ridiculous, of course I mean Me.

    Followers