House Rules

So I was at my mom's this weekend, and my siblings are giving me hell for what they call, "some shit they woulda never got away with."

I don't see the big deal.

Ok, so I hung out with him (I know, I know). Spent the evening watching the fight with some friends, and chilling... spent most of the morning on a park bench talking. So around sunrise we head home. As my head hits the pillow, the shots of Patrón, and the glasses of Riesling finally hit me like sudden solutions. I soon surrender into dreamland, when I hear Hi Tek chirpin about The 'Natti (think Ohio, folks) on my cellie. It's a text msg from him saying he's locked out of his mom's crib. Looks like she got her deadbolt game tight before bed.

"Whatchu gonna do?"
"I called the house, called my sister, banged on the damn door."
"You can come here."
"You sure?"
"What am I gonna say, 'Hope you figure something out, B,' and hang up the phone?"
"You're sure it'll be ok with your mom?"
"She's still asleep, but I'll leave her a note. She'll be in church for most the morning, so it's all good."

He gets across town to the So Wise Upstate Estate in record time.

My mom is just getting up for church, so I tell her what's up and she says it's cool. Now I had considered taking him around the block to my brother's crib, but decided against it because, well, my brother doesn't like seeing me with boys. Whatev.

So I bring him up to my room, close the door, turn on SportsCenter, give him some scrubs to put on, and he's straight.

No need to get into the particulars...that's another blog for another day.

But long story short...we fall asleep for a bit, and wake up to the smell of curry chicken. My sister is over, cooking for Father's Day dinner. I go down to the kitchen while he gets dressed to leave, and I tell her what's up. She's like..."Huh?" So before he leaves I re-intro them and he bounces.

Of course she can't wait to tell. As soon as my family starts trickling in for dinner that afternoon she says, "Wise brought a BOY home last night!"

I keep saying..."He got locked out!"

My sister in law is particularly interested in the details ("Why you didnt bring him to my house?")...as are my brothers, who don't say nothing. They just listen.

"And it was THIS MORNING... NOT last NIGHT!"

They ignore the logical details and proceed with gasps and 'oh hell naws.'

I'm struggling to understand the root of this perceived infraction.

Was it inappropriate to have a man in my childhood bedroom with the door closed? [My answer, yes...15 years ago. Today? No...I am grown.

I'm normally pretty old school in this respect, having been raised by traditional West Indian parents who don't play that shit...but I'm finding it hard to understand why the uproar.

Is it really that they are clinging to a glimmer of hope that this man may soon make an honest woman of my no-longer-so-young, unwed black azz?

Are they just mad that they couldn't pull this off in their day?

Are my siblings just haters?

Or am I really as gully as they allege?

Can't call it.

PS ...Y'all so nosy...Naw, I aint hit.